No, I don't mean the time when the door bursts open weekdays at 4pm, a loud bellow of "I'm Home!" is followed by a trail of jackets, shoes, and backpacks leading to the refrigerator in a quest for the perfect snack.
I'm talking about when the tassel is moved, followed by a trail of tears, embraces, and promises to stay in touch among their peers.
Welcome to the First Day of the Rest of Their Lives.
The end to compulsory education. The end of summer vacation. The end of Mom and Dad's obligatory legal protection.
This is why they call it "commencement". Not to mark an end, but a new beginning.
Frustrated parents wonder why they can't get their offspring off the couch and be the self-motivators they want them to be.
Ever stop to think they might not know how? And by the time they do, it's like cramming for a final exam?
So when should you start planning for your child's future?
Financially, at birth. Take a minimum of half of your annual income tax return and dedicate it for the very purpose of higher education.
And keep your mouth shut about it. As far as your kid and the rest of the world is concerned, it doesn't exist.
In terms of sitting down, deciding on college or technical school, things like that, it should start the moment your child hits high school.
Find out what your child wants to do with his or her life. And support that choice. If they want to become a lawyer, fine. If they want to bake cakes and maybe have their own bakery, that's fine too. Don't push them to the path of what you want them to be. It's not about you.
If your child is undecided, suggest a two-year program at your local community college, with an undeclared major. Encourage your child to take all gen-ed courses (which in most cases are fully transferrable) until they figure it out.
And if they don't, they (or you) aren't out a lot of money. Most families are recognizing the value of community college affordability compared to the costs of a full four years at a college or university.
And make your child aware of this: the clock is ticking.
While it may sound harsh, the reality is, their existence is based on the ultimate goal of self-sufficiency and becoming a productive member of society. The day will come when they are expected to strike out and live life on their own.
And no...charging your child rent (no matter how high) does not translate into them being on their own. However, it is still a good way to transition them into the outside world if they know in advance to budget their money for needs first, and wants second.
But the bottom line is this: the day will come when they, and you, will need to let go.
NEXT WEEK: "Daddy...I'm Pregnant...Part I"
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